To read or not to read
First, the (tentative) good news. This morning I went in for the fine-needle aspiration, which turned out to include not only an ultrasound, but, based on what they saw on the ultrasound, a CT scan—bonus!
The needle bit wasn’t bad. There were four people in and out of the room, and they kept stepping out into the hallway to talk, which was a little stressful, but it’s probably better that I didn’t hear all the details anyway. The part with actual stabbiness was nearly pain-free. Uncomfortable, yes—three tiny numbing needles and some poking around in my neck—but preferable to, say, a series of paper cuts, or dropping a dictionary on your toes.
As for the lump, it turned out to be full of fluid. We won’t know for sure until the pathology results come back, but the people standing around seemed pleased, so I’m taking this as a good sign. The doctor didn’t seem to think it was an infection—this time the money is on it being a lymphocele.
Of course this put me in an excellent mood, despite my having only a vague idea of what a lymphocele was. According to the doctor, it’s an accumulation of fluid in a lymph node . . . for some reason. The question becomes, then, do I use the magical powers of the interweb to learn more, or do I leave well enough alone so as not to fuel my active imagination?
Earlier I chose not to look up all the words describing the different sorts of tumors Larry might be because I was sure to run across stories of people who had these things, underwent eight painful surgeries, spent five years in the ICU, bled out of all their orifices and died. My imagination can conjure up plenty of frightening worst-case scenarios on its own, thank you very much*.
But this time it seemed the likelihood of spooky stories was much lower, so curiosity won out. And wouldn’t you know—lymphoceles are relatively friendly. They’re usually caused by . . . kidney transplants, after which they’re found in the abdomen. Ok, so what about lymphoceles in the neck? Neck surgery. According to one abstract,
Spontaneous and asymptomatic supraclavicular thoracic duct cysts (lymphoceles) are rare. Only five cases have been reported so far.
So I’m special? Maybe? The only slightly-scary article I’ve found so far is this summary of lymphangiomas, though it focuses more on very young children.
I’m rather enjoying sorting through all this research—I love love love reading dense technical literature. The precision with which these authors wield the language is delicious. (Bonus: So many new words to learn! Eeee!) Maybe I should become a brain surgeon after all, as so many people cheerfully recommended to school-age me.
Okay, I should go. I could spend the whole day learning about the lymphatic system, but I’ve got about seven billion projects to work on now that I’m off from school. Bottom line: barring any “malignancies” presenting themselves under the microscope, Larry’s outcome looks promising. Not promising for Larry, I mean—sorry, big guy.
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* Parents: DO NOT let your children watch Rescue 911. Kids don’t have a decent grasp of statistics (neither do many adults, sadly), and it’s tough to convince them that near-fatal accidents and medical emergencies are unlikely to befall them or their families in the near future when they see those things happen to unsuspecting folks every day on television. Rescue 911 was one of my favorite shows, and I’m pretty sure it fucked with my head—I lived in near-constant fear of dying of a sudden heart attack from age 8 to maybe 17. Also, your children should not read Reader’s Digest. Rare-but-tragic diseases abound.
Tags: Larry the Lump