Prepoceros

And DAMN is my hand tired. Analysis final this morning + Medieval Lit final this afternoon = TWELVE handwritten pages. Ow.

Both exams went well, and I’m done with this semester! (Except for a wee bit of my online Greek course, but . . . done done done!) I celebrated with an iced tiramisu latte. Did you know such a thing existed? Me neither, but it was fabulous.

In other news, my sleep schedule is all screwed up (which is why I’m here at 1:30 in the morning) because worrying? Is not conducive to sleep. In case you weren’t aware.

There’s this lump, you see, growing out of my neck. My sore wrist doesn’t want to type out the whole story (you can watch the video instead if you’d like). For a while I thought it was a swollen gland from an infected wisdom tooth, and if I could just get some antibiotics, I’d be fine.

Except that it’s not a swollen gland. The doctor thinks it’s a lipoma, which isn’t so bad (minor surgery), but it’s REALLY BIG for a lipoma and it’s getting bigger EVERY GODDAMN DAY. I’m getting an MRI in 31 hours and I can. not. fucking. wait.

I worry myself sick over the silliest things, and I hate it. The worrying is almost always worse than whatever I’m afraid of. During the day I’m all rational and “Hey! Big chunk of fat! That’s so gross, haha!” but at night, when I have nothing else to think about, it’s more like “Omg the cancer is reaching out to squeeze my windpipe it’s spreading to my lymph nodes right now I CAN FEEL IT.”

See, right now, just from thinking about it, I’m imagining a choking sensation and occasional shooting pains up the side of my neck. They’re almost certainly not real symptoms, but they FEEL real, and that makes me scared, which makes me dizzy and sweaty, and THAT scares me more. Woo, watch me work myself into a tizzy. It’s like a mini panic attack OMG FUN!

So yeah. Not so much with the sleeping. I know I’m silly. I know I know. I probably shouldn’t blog when I’m scared, sorry. Thirty hours and forty-seven minutes.

Tags: Larry the Lump, school

This entry was posted on Tuesday, December 12th, 2006 at 1:43 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.